blizzard: mercy has 100% pickrate in comp and no one wants to play the other healers which means she’s too op so we have to nerf her
me climbing up to jeff kaplan’s ear: maybe the reason people only pick mercy isn’t because she’s overpowered but because all the other healers are extremely underpowered and picking mercy as a healer is the only thing that makes sense in winning a game anymore because none of the other healers have abilities that can keep their team alive as efficiently as mercy. this isn’t a problem with mercy jeff, keeping the team alive is what a healer is supposed to do. so maybe instead of nerfing mercy and making her unable to do that, you should be buffing your other three healers so they can be as valuable of a team asset as mercy and make your game actually fair and balanced for support mains for once in your miserable life.
I love them so much because they’re about as sharp as a baseball and their anatomy is ridiculous to the point of them literally being classified as plankton for years because they just sort of get blown around by the ocean and look confused, but because they lay more eggs than ANY OTHER VERTEBRATE IN EXISTENCE, evolution can’t stop them
Why is no big predator coming and gnawing on them?
Their biggest defense is that they’re massive and have super tough skin, but they do get hunted by sharks or sea lions sometimes and they just sort of float there like ‘oh bother’ as it happens
Even funnier, because they eat nothing but jellyfish they’re really low in nutritional value anyway, so they basically survive by being not worth eating because they’re like a big floating rice cracker wrapped in leather.
So basically the only reason natural selection hasn’t taken care if them is because they are the most useless fish
yes, they’ve perfected uselessness to the point of being unstoppable
honestly some of y’all want a significant other so badly and can’t understand why you can’t find one, but have no sense of boundaries or healthy expectations of what a relationship is like. in a committed long-term partnership you get left on read, you wait for texts back, and you can forget about each other when you’re busy. sometimes you fall asleep without saying goodnight and sometimes you’re too caught up to text each other before 6pm. that’s how it is. thinking that you can’t be deeply, beautifully in love and still wait more than “1.75 hours” for a text back is such an unhealthy and unreasonable expectation of what love is, and you shouldn’t be in a relationship if you can’t allow the other person to exist on their own apart from you. if you’re projecting your anxieties and insecurities onto a partner who doesn’t even exist yet, then you aren’t ready for one.
I’m actually glad we don’t live in an RPG world. We really take for granted being able to coexist with most animals. I don’t wanna have to pull out a longsword and beat the shit out of six crabs and two snails while a starfish snipes me with magic bullets every time I go to the beach.